NOSTIGMAS ALLY BLOG
Documenting the lives of the NoStigmas community through stories, creative works & advocacy related to mental illness and suicide.
Is this what a doctor feels like when they "did everything they could" to save someone's life and ultimately lose them? But what more could I have done, really? What more can anyone do when someone sees death as the only solution to a life of pain? We can’t control someone else’s actions. We can’t “fix” anyone else, no matter how hard we might try. I know that I did everything in my power to support her. But I still feel like a helpless six-year-old fatherless child all over again.
But 2 weeks after discharge, I attempted something more serious. I tried to jump under a train. The police helped me down but all in all I attempted suicide 7 times and I am here now 18 months later very happy and very confident.
I read the poem to all of the musicians before we started recording, and talented group of individuals played what came to their heart when it touched their ears.
This, I think, is the great gift of coming through a depression. Learning that life is much bigger than your perception is a gift. It can lead to being a little more humble, a little more hopeful, and little more open to learning about someone else’s perspective…it could make up for a blind spot in your own.
On a summer night in 1995, I came home to a message on my answering machine -- my father telling me my mother was threatening suicide.
